Mimi and Kevin

"Mimi" and "Kevin" are two members of Journeyman Paul's most intimate, inner circle, his Soul Family. During this incarnation as Drew Fisher, Mimi played the role of 'first girlfriend' as well as that of amazing friend for a ten year window in my youth. A psychiatrist who became nationally regarded for her research on and advocacy for psychiatric care and treatment of adolescents, Mimi succumbed to cancer at fairly young age.
     Mimi's appearance in my life quite literally opened the 'flood gates' of love. In retrospect, I think that I had been waiting for such a relationship, that my thinly encrusted heart was primed and ready for such an explosion as I can remember two very serious, emotionally complex "crushes" in my youth that preceded my meeting Mimi. At that time my nervous system was as yet unable to handle the uncontrollable flood and overwhelming rush of feeling that accompanied any contact or, heaven forbid, interaction with members of the opposite sex. My sensitivity was so profound that I would invariably flush beet red and my eyes would brim with welling tears. It was debilitating! Needless to say, having a class with any of these school girls was no small challenge.
     Mimi and I had but one actual week together before the heart-wrenching event occurred of my family's relocation to a new home in a town 282 miles away from Mimi. It unfolded as a summer of pining away. I devoted hours each day to multi-page, stream of consciousness letters. Phone calls were occasionally permitted and we were able to eek out three visits with each other before a much wiser and more mature Mimi (though only 15 years old) saw the futility of this long-distance relationship and the wisdom of breaking up. We were, it is a fact, too young to be wasting away our lives like this. Our mothers had been saying throughout our intense 'affair' that they wished we had met when we were ten years older. This sentiment turned out to be rather prophetic, as you will see later in this podcast.
     Despite our breakup, our lives were to remain somewhat entwined. Little did either of us expect to find ourself just two years later face-to-face at the freshman orientation picnic on the lawn of the college that we had both serendipitously chosen. While we never felt compelled to rekindle the intense relationship that had engulfed us two years before, Mimi played a wonderfully supportive and kind of 'reality check' role in my life as a very close friend throughout our four years in college together. This was especially true during our six months spent as part of a group from our college on foreign study at the university in Strasbourg, France.
     It was at this same small midwestern liberal arts college that Mimi and I coincidentally ended up attending that I met and befriended a fellow pre-med student named Kevin. Kevin was 'out there'--in- your-face out there. A very outgoing, social, politically active creature, Kevin also had a very quiet, sensitive and vulnerable side that not many people got to see. His equal affinity to Mimi double-forged a bond between us and the struggles associated with his personal battle with bone cancer, his openly flamboyant in your face presentation of his bisexuality coupled with his sincere and deeply engaged care and concern for others exposed me to several dimensions and forms of love, empathy, and compassion to which I had not given much attention or energy before. Where Mimi was 'the key master' whom I credit for opening the wellspring of Love wanting to burst from within me, Kevin was 'the architect' who helped me to see and understand the myriad choices I had in which to aim, channel or direct this 'fountain' of love.
     My mother, having seen the way in which I loved so deeply and so intensely with each and every one of my girl friends, declared that really I was just in love with being in love--or maybe "in love with love" was how she may have put it. I think she may have been right. But, then, thanks to the example of Kevin--whom I later recognized as a living, breathing version of one of my beloved messianic protagonists because of the stunning way he had of befriending virtually everyone he ever met with his in-your-face humor filled with blatant sexual innuendo. I mean, be it an 80-year old World War I veteran, a 56-year old bakery employee, a university professor, the dormitory janitor, a nurse, a homeless man, or a college coed, Kevin could have that person laughing, hugging, and willing to lay down his or her life for him or for whatever cause or reason he might give, all in the first meeting! Within the first five minutes of that meeting!
      I am so fortunate to have countless occasions burned into my memory of watching Kevin awaken life, love, trust, joy, laughter, hope, child-like playfulness, and boundless devotion in the individuals he perchance encountered. And I know that it is his example--the precious hours of being in his presence--that enabled me to realize how important it was for me to extricate myself from my 'monastic' tendencies. Up until that time, the patterns of behavior that I most often fell into, the habits and tendencies that were most comfortable to me in everyday life, were those of solitude and isolation, of introspection and internal dialogue. In watching Kevin I was able to come to an understanding of the value and benefits to social interaction, the way in which a loving soul could infect and inspire others to raise their own levels of love, joy, and happiness--if only temporarily. His gift to me was in the awareness that actively loving, that is, loving others in the moment, in the here and now, was worthwhile, would always bring an increase in flow of the most sacred and divine life forces--for one's self as well as for others. Kevin's presence in my life helped to awaken in me the internal beacon of purpose--an inkling of awareness of the 'bigger' Plan Journeyman Paul had prepared for me. I believe that Paul, Kevin and Mimi planned these turns of events long before they ever played out.
     This is further borne out by the saying that I have found myself attached to since my teens--a saying that I recognize, revisit and reconfirm almost every day: that my greatest, most valuable lessons are to be found with people, in contact with and in the company of people. I attribute this saying to the voice of Journeyman Paul; that is, I believe it comes from Paul's voice, Paul's reminder to me that, yes, we've had many lives in the safety and comfort of inwardly focused and self-isolating tendencies but that this time we have a different plan--this time we're going to take the plunge; we're going to take the risk of being with people, of trying to apply our collective knowledge, wisdom and courage being being among people. Kevin played the crucial role of demonstrating for me our Plan--an ideal, Christ-like version of how we, too, could choose to learn on this trip to Earth School.
     I found out not too long ago that Kevin, too, has left the planet. Also a psychiatrist, Kevin focused his energy on working with underprivileged disenfranchised populations in Hawaii and, later, San Francisco. He was killed in freakish cable car accident in San Francisco. It had been fully 20 years since I had had any direct contact with him.
     Mimi, I saw only once after our college days had ended. In the tenth anniversary year of our initial meeting and "summer of love" I found her and paid her a visit. She had married (Kevin and I had attended her wedding--both chomping at the bit to speak out when the minister not once but twice asked the congregation whether or not anyone had any good reason why these two should not be joined in holy matrimony). She was living a repressed life and was unhappy in her marriage. Most of her energy, of her joy and satisfaction, was derived from her scientific research and through her intense focus in trying to get into medical school. I arrived and proceeded to unceremoniously and rather mischievously announce that it had been ten years and that I was here to start over. This led to a release of some very deeply repressed sadness from Mimi: She collapsed into tears--which led to hours of holding each other, talking and reminiscing. It was all rather innocent and therapeutic--though her mother was worried sick that we were in danger of causing Mimi to break her "sacred vows" of marriage. However, my intentions had actually been all in fun--though my love for Mimi is profound and indisputable. We both knew--and had known for a long time--that we were not really 'right' for each other.
     Anyway, you can imagine my delight--and, I must admit, surprise--when during a recent Life-Between-Life Session I found Kevin and Mimi, holding hands, as they were often playfully wont to do while together on Earth, sidled up within Paul's most intimate circle of soul family members. This event, alone, has prompted me, Drew Fisher, to revisit and reflect upon the events from the relationships I had with both of those beautiful human beings. The deeper meanings and significances that I've been able to extract from those exercises has helped me to realize what tremendously helpful roles they both played in the process of awakening and expansion of my spiritual awareness and flow--especially with regards to my ever-expanding understanding, flow and use of Love in its many forms.
     The telling of this story is meant to elucidate the fact that there are layers and layers of information available to each and every one of us to be found simply through our relationships. I have not been in the physical presence of either Mimi or Kevin for over 25 years, and yet the lessons revealing themselves to me from 'interacting' with them within my own memory has given me ample food for continued growth and expansion. Their examples, their words, their actions, their attentions, their loves have been so valuable to me--much more than I had ever before understood! Mimi, was like my Virgin Mary, and Kevin, my messianic Christ. That's how important they have been to my life. I am so thankful for the 'gifts' they gave and for the sacrifices they made for my benefit. I am unsure and unclear as to whether my presence in their lives had any value or contribution for their own growth. I hope so. I look forward to finding out once I leave this Drew Fisher vehicle and rejoin them in the spirit world in the form of Journeyman Paul.